I'm afraid this may be a shorter blog than I would wish, but there are things to be done, places to go, people to meet. (YES!!)
Yesterday was a good day - good in many senses. Good weather. Good food. Good beer. There we are - finished!
Ah well, go on then, I'll tell you a little more about it.
The bed in my room, and I'm sure in all the other rooms in the hotel le Priori, is very comfortable, but it was with a sense of optimism that I jumped out of it yesterday morning. [That's a bit strong isn't it - jumped?] OK, it was with a sense of optimism that I rolled out of it yesterday morning. [That's more accurate!] Lots of exploring to do, possibly some shopping, possibly some food, possibly some quebecoise beer.
So, into the shower cubicle for morning ablutions. Hello, hello what's this then - nice big shower head, and then two more pipes just sticking out of the walls, one which would cause a nasty injury to the small of the back if you weren't too careful, and another, on the wall opposite, below the main shower head, and a little lower down which could really do you an injury if you weren't careful. Strange, to have unfinished plumbing in such a pleasant hotel room. Turn on the shower as quickly as possible, to get past the cold blast of water.
"TABARN!!!!! Calis!", as they might exclaim here in Quebec. "Sh*te!!" as one might exclaim back in north east England. Not one, not two, but three jets of icy cold water hit me simultaneously - there was no escape! One on my head, one in the small of my back, and the other in a place which I am much too refined to detail!
They probably heard my scream across the St.Laurence in Levis. Pinned up against the one wall where there wasn't a pipe delivering 40000 litres of icy water per second, I managed to reach across and turn the shower control a further 45 degrees, thus allowing a figurative gulf stream to warm the waters of the polar regions from whence it must surely have originated. The rest of the showering went without a hitch, but, and this where the excitement of the day reached another level of heightenment. [There's a word you don't often hear, but carry on.]
Those of a delicate nature, or who might faint at the mention of blood, should miss out this next paragraph. I wouldn't want the responsibility of causing further injury, and being sued for damages. The offending paragraph will be italised, for your convenience.
As I was drying myself after the invigorating shower recently described, I had one of those "Oh no!" moments. Oh dear, a smear of blood on the towel. Perhaps a small nose bleed? No. Perhaps a previously unnoticed finger cut? No. Hmm. Drip. [Drip, what do you mean drip?] Drip. Oh look, on the floor, blood. There's no one else here, so it must be mine. Nothing untoward in the head or upper body regions. God, I'm bleeding to death from somewhere in the nether regions! A tentative exploratory investigation resulted in a hand covered in the red stuff. Drip. Aaagh!! Will I live to see Luce on Saturday? Further investigation detected the source of this massive blood loss [oh come on, it was hardly 'massive']. OK, not massive, but it just wouldn't stop, and it would be difficult to stick on an elastoplast! At this point for those curious enough to wonder about the source of this... considerable blood loss, and who might also enjoy a word puzzle - rearrange "sumcort". I knew I should have filed down that broken finger nail!
Breakfast went well apart from losing two blood-stained wads of tissue down my left trouser leg as I approached my table.
The rest of the day turned out to be much more enjoyable, and because I am about to be turned out of my hotel room, I will leave that until later.
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